Tuesday, June 14, 2011

This Kind of Memory Loss is OK

Over the last 3-6 months, I've noticed a significant difference in certain aspects of my memory.

I can't seem to quickly recall many of the details regarding people and events in my past.  For instance, I'll think of a person I've known very well for years -- and yet it will take a while to come up with that person's name.  I used to have an excellent memory for past details in my life, but that bank of information isn't easily accessible now.  It's as if the files containing that information have been deleted, or have been moved to a remote location.

It's not a physical issue or a matter of aging, such as when we say "I'm just getting older and more forgetful."  I'm sure it's not that.

Intuitively, I know that those details of the past are no longer as important to me.  These details were important when I was attached strongly to the individual ego identity.  However, as nondual investigation matures, and I see beyond the limited, separate self (at least most of the time!), these "facts" of the past lose importance and are no longer at the forefront of my thinking.

At first, I found this quite surprising.  I'd be thinking about something that was so important to me for years, and find that I had little or no recollection of the details of the event.  However, it makes a lot of sense to me now.

As the mind begins to see through the personal story, the focus is more on the present.  There's no need to cling to the personal story of the individual.  Instead, there's a letting go of people and events of the past.  This is a healthy development, as I see it.  This is one kind of memory loss that's ok.